I was blessed today to watch this video, posted on Facebook by one of my mom's Harding friends.
The video was recorded in her last year of life... after her cancer returned for the third (and final) time. This video is a treasure to me. I've heard her testimony before, but of course each re-telling of it contains bits and pieces that are slightly varied. Most of all I love getting to see her face and hear her voice and remember her mannerisms as she recounts her story of God's faithfulness through the hardships of this earth.
It was startling to watch this and see just how similar her thoughts are to so many of mine. Startling and sad... because the fear she expressed more than anything was the fear that she'd leave her husband and kids to go on without her. And that was a valid fear... as we now know. But, what none of us can see now is what I think she is wishing she could add to the end of the interview... her hindsight account of that which is to come! We have no idea! One day we will know. Praise God that death has been swallowed up in victory!
I'll add that amidst the incredible blessing this video is to me, it does bring bits of anger back to the surface of my heart as Chris and I take this journey of our own through genetic testing and preventative surgery. I want to know why my mom didn't get those options. Yes, I am thankful God has revealed this mystery to my generation and that I am able to fight proactively... but I can see the very real pain, hurt, and fear that my parents went through years ago, and I can't help but feel those rising waves of indignance. Why why why? I'll never understand quite fully. Not really.
I hope this video encourages you. One of my mom's life messages was "This is not all there is." Amen.
:)
4 comments:
I have yet to watch the whole video yet. But I was immediately struck by how familiar her voice sounded even to me all these years later. Such a treasure for you I'm sure.
My mom and I have been talking about you often lately. I just want you to know we are praying for you. And we are so impressed and inspired by you and the woman you've become.
I watched this video last night, and I cried. I have heard what wonderful person that Vicki was, but to hear her story in her own words made me realize it for myself. Chris did an amazing job as a single parent, but I see Vicki, in one way or another, in all of you kids. Thank you for sharing.
This is life-changing! It was incredible to watch this... Thank you for sharing. The tears came when she discussed how she felt joy at the opportunity to draw closer to God due to her illness. Wow, just wow. I love you Cariss!
You mom is my hero. Not a day goes by that I don't think of her. She was a great friend and a wonderful example to me. Thank you so very much for sharing this video. I miss her so much - it was great to see her beautiful face and hear her voice after all these years!
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