Can't Escape the Weddings :)

I went with my suite mate Christy to the Bridal store today. I've now done this with a few friends, and I gotta tell ya... I'm glad to go as long as THEY are the bride and not me. I very much enjoy being able to put my opinion in when it comes to a big decision someone has to make (like a dress.) I feel like a girl definitely needs someone there who's willing to tell her the truth, thumbs up or thumbs down. But I think that when and if the time comes for ME to select a wedding dress, I want nothing to do with those shops. I'm trying to figure out why. I think its because everything feels so standardized... like straight off the assembly line. Its meant to feel like we have all the choice in the matter, "pick a style... pick a color... pick a size..." But in truth, you're completely subject to whatever's hot at the time. How is a girl supposed to feel like her dress is really her own, when she knows full well that there are eighty jillion just like it? And even the ladies working there bothered me. And all the dresses were so HEAVY. (As in, they weighed about 80 lbs.) And the industry has made it so you have to wear a million things with it. You HAVE to have a corset, you NEED a petticoat to make the skirt pouf out, etc.
This is what today has made me decide about my own wedding dress:
-I don't want to buy it at a Bridal Store
-I don't want there to be a million just like it
-I don't want it to be heavy
-I don't want to wear uncomfortable underwear just so it'll look good
-I don't want it to be white (i want it to be cream, i look good in cream.)
-I don't want it to cost an arm and a leg... its just a dress! I'll most likely never wear it again!
Is this possible? Probably not. Good thing I'm not the bride.
But speaking of not being the bride... I've discovered a problem. While I have no desire right now to be either a bride OR a girlfriend of any kind, I've found myself feeling very alone and starved for affection. That sounds so awful. But really... I'm one of those people who IS very phyiscal, but only with a select few people. Namely my brother and sister and whoever I'm dating at the time. Here's where the problem is. I've spent this whole summer sharing a bed with my sister, and all of a sudden I'm back at Harding with no one... NO one, to snuggle with. And this seems so silly but its not. I get into bed every night and feel sad that I have no one to sleep with. And I think this is a problem because its a weak state to be in. I feel like it makes me susceptible to doing stupid things.
And honestly, I see no solution. No solution that isn't stupid (read: irresponsible.) And that frightens me a bit.